what are you trying to say? September 26, 2008
Posted by deepali in personal growth.trackback
Recently, Emily wrote a great post about stuff, in which she made some very key points about how your stuff does not define you. I think, to a great extent, that is true. But I also think that your stuff does indeed say something.
We all judge each other – it’s a natural habit that is probably coded in our genes (presumably, we needed a way to quickly assess a situation or person and react). So I know that I make some judgments about people based on their stuff. Some things that I think stuff says:
How do you relate your environment?
What is your mental state?
Where are you attached?
What matters the most?
Who is really in control here?
I think it says something about you if you have a lot of stuff. And it says something about you if you don’t. The type of stuff matters too. Are you conscientious? Or do you just like crap?
Stuff talks. What do you want it to say?
You have given me more to think about, which is fantastic. I may reply to this in another post on my blog. For me, the problems lies in that two people can see the same thing and take from it totally different conclusions. So while *I* may think that driving a hybrid means a person cares about the environment, another person could think that just means a person is trendy. And both could be true. I would have to get to know the person before I’d actual figure out which one they are.
For me, people can take away different things from what I have or don’t have.
So at the end of the day, I just have to be me, and know that my things are saying things about me, but maybe not always saying things that are true.
have you read judith levine’s “not buying it”? you might enjoy it. fun , smart book. in any case, one of the things she has a really hard time with during this year that she buys nothing is reserving judgment of those who DO buy. I think the happier and more conscious we become of our relationship to stuff, the more likely we are (I am speaking about my personal experience here of course, not yours) to exercise some kind of (often unfortunate) judgment about others’. It happens to me all the time. I find myself actively feeling sorry for the girls who just won’t shut up about their iphones.
in any case i am going to write a post about this but i want my stuff to say that i am classy and minimalistic, laid-back and clever. i want my stuff to say that i’m above stuff (such a snob. sorry and everything.) i feel like if you keep things small enough you don’t even have to worry about how good it looks because i am one of those people that thinks empty looks awesome . much better than full! yes, there are empty rooms in my apartment. ahem.
ok. i’m going to go write a blog post about what my stuff says.
@ Emily – I am foreseeing a series of post-replies. I love it.
And you are absolutely right that different people see different things. Even the same item makes me think different things depending on the person. But some things I think are universal – the more stuff you have, the more you look as though you are obsessed with stuff. And I think the converse is true. And there’s nothing that says you can’t be both trendy and environmentally-conscious. In fact, I think the best marketing move we can make is to make world-saving trendy.
@ NM – I am exactly the same way (particularly about those iphones). But then I think about how I’m obsessing over a cute new GPS unit, and realize that one could make the same point about me. Regardless, my stuff tells me I’ve got a cluttered mind.
I think when I see stuff I tells me about taste, priorities & where a person sits on the humanity stance – blimey that sounds very judgemental!!
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